Category: Computer Jokes

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Ranking: 2.53 / 95
A blonde walks into a store that makes curtains. She says to the clerk, "I would like curtains the size of my computer screen. The clerk says, "Why the size of you computer screen?" The woman replies, "Because I've got windows!"
Thanks to: Jenna Lackey - ALBQ - Mew Mexico - USA.
rec.:Oct/31/2003    pub.:Dec/10/2003    sent:Oct/13/2005

Ranking: 2.64 / 75
Q: Why was the computer so cold?
A: Because it forgot to shut its window
Thanks to: ISABELLE - SYDNEY - NSW - Australia
rec.:Apr/6/2009    pub.:Oct/6/2009    sent:Oct/16/2009

Ranking: 2.67 / 69
An application was for employment; a program was a TV show; a cursor used profanity; a keyboard was a piano.
Memory was something you lost with age; a CD was a bank account; a hard drive was a long road trip. 
A web was a spider's home, and a virus was the flu!
Thanks to: Simple Sentiments - Pembroke Pines - Florida - USA.
rec.:Jan/15/2000    pub.:Jan/15/2000    sent:Jan/15/2000

Ranking: 2.85 / 47
The 12-Step Program for Internet Addicts

1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I use to.
2) I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing.
3) I will get dressed before noon.
4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash the dog, get the kids off to school, all before even thinking of the Internet.
5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Internet-deprived.
6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Internet.
7) I will read a book...if I still remember how.
8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear what is happening on the Web.
9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email.
10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not.
11) I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on my computer.
12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed some time....and the Internet will always be there tomorrow!
Thanks to: Gemma Piscotti - Chicago - IL - USA.
rec.:Feb/28/2000    pub.:Feb/28/2000    sent:Feb/28/2000

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