A woman goes to her doctor. She has a breadstick up her nose, a potato in her right ear and string bean in her left ear.
She says, "Doctor, can you help me? I don't feel well, and I cannot figure out what's wrong."
The doctor replies; "Well my dear you are clearly not eating properly!"
Cows*are*funny - Canada
rec.:Jul/31/2003 pub.:Aug/19/2003 sent:Sep/21/2003
2.77 / 65
A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, nobody pays attention to me…"
And the doctor says, "Next please..."
Andreas Hadjiandonis - Limassol - Cyprus - Cyprus
rec.:Dec/25/1998 pub.:Dec/25/1998 sent:Dec/25/1998
2.71 / 70
“Doctor, I keep thinking I’m a goat.” “How long have you had this feeling?”
“Ever since I was a kid.”
Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Mar/30/2009 pub.:Mar/30/2009 sent:Jan/31/2010
3.13 / 40
Old Granny Parkinson had won over half a million dollars in the lottery, but as she was a frail little woman her family was concerned that the shock of hearing the news might prove too much for her. Accordingly, they called in the family doctor to ask his advice.
“I’ll tell her if you like,” said the doctor. “I’ll lead up to it gradually.” The family accepted his offer gratefully, and showed him into the old lady’s bedroom. The doctor pretended to give her a routine examination and then began to chat generally of this and that, carefully leading the conversation ‘round to money. “Tell me Mrs. Parkinson,” he said, “what would you do if you suddenly came into half a million dollars?”
“Half a million?” said the old lady reflectively, “well you’ve always been very good to me, doctor, so I think I’d give half of it to you.”
And the doctor immediately collapsed and died of shock.
Anonymous - USA.