Category: Doctors Jokes

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Ranking: 3.42 / 104
A man consults a therapist and states, “Doc, I’m suicidal. What should I do?”
The doctor replies, “Pay in advance.”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Dec/23/2003    pub.:Dec/23/2003    sent:Jun/4/2011

Ranking: 3.15 / 156
Peter called his doctor’s office for an appointment. “I’m sorry,” said the receptionist, “we can’t fit you in for at least two weeks.”
“But I could be dead by then!”
“No problem. If your wife lets us know, we’ll cancel the appointment.”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jul/20/2002    pub.:Jul/20/2002    sent:Mar/11/2012

Ranking: 3.56 / 84
Things Not to Hear During Surgery,Part I I Could you stop that thing from beating? It's throwing my concentration off..
What's this doing here?
I hate it when they're missing stuff in here.
That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?!
I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.
Well folks, this will be an experiment for us all.
Sterile, shcmerile. The floor's clean, right?
Anyone see where I left that scalpel?
This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.
FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out now!!
Darn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
Thanks to: Avery Linder
rec.:Mar/18/2001    pub.:Mar/18/2001    sent:Mar/18/2001

Ranking: 3.26 / 117
A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc., everytime I drink coffee, I get terrible pains in my eye."
The doctor says, "Try taking the spoon out first."
Thanks to: Jessi Brooks - Greenville - Alabama - USA.
rec.:Oct/17/2002    pub.:Jan/13/2003    sent:Jun/20/2013

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