Category: Elderly Jokes



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Ranking: 3.57 / 84
Two elderly couples were enjoying a friendly conversation when one of the men asked the other, "Fred, how was the memory clinic you went to last month?" 
"Outstanding," Fred replied. "They taught us all the latest psychological techniques: visualization, association, etc. It was great." 
"That's great! And what was the name of the clinic?" 
Fred went blank. He thought and thought, but couldn't remember. Then a smile broke across his face and he asked, "What do you call that flower with the long stem and thorns?" 
"You mean a rose?" 
"Yes, that's it!" 
He turned to his wife, "Rose, what was the name of that memory clinic?" 
#649    
Thanks to: SimpleSentiments.com - Pembroke - Pines Florida  - USA.
rec.:May/25/2000    pub.:May/25/2000    sent:Mar/6/2014


Ranking: 3.26 / 126
Mr. and Mrs. Thorne had just reached the airport in the nick of time to catch the plane for their two-week's vacation in Majorca. "I wish we'd brought the piano with us," said Mr. Thorne. "What on earth for?" asked his wife.
"I've left the tickets on it."
#6624    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Nov/14/2002    pub.:Nov/14/2002    sent:Mar/22/2014


Ranking: 2.98 / 194
A police officer was investigating an accident on a two-lane, narrow road in which the drivers had hit virtually head-on.

One driver, an extremely elderly woman, kept repeating, "He wouldn't let me have my half of the road!"

After gathering as much information as possible, he angrily approached the other driver, who was examining his own damage. The police officer asked, "That old lady says that you wouldn't let her have her half of the road. Why not?

In exasperation, the man turns from his smashed car and says, "Officer, I would have been HAPPY to give her half of the road --- if she had just let me know WHICH half she wanted!!!!"
#14468    
Thanks to: Steve Smith - USA.
rec.:Jan/7/2005    pub.:Jan/13/2005    sent:Oct/14/2011


Ranking: 3.26 / 123
A man was telling his neighbor, “I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it’s state of the art. It’s perfect.”
“Really,” answered the neighbor. “What kind is it?”
“Twelve thirty”
#11344    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Oct/13/2003    pub.:Oct/13/2003    sent:Nov/18/2003


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