Category: Entertainment Jokes



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Ranking: 3.21 / 113
A Swiss man, looking for directions, pulls up at a bus stop where two Americans are waiting. “Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?” he asks. The two Americans just stare at him. “Excusez-moi, parlez vous Fracais?” he tries. The two continue to stare. “Parlare Italiano?” No response. “Hablan ustedes Espanol?” Still nothing. The Swiss guy drives off, extremely disgusted. The first American turns to the second and says, “Y’know, maybe we should learn a foreign language.” “Why?” says the other. “That guy knew four languages, and it didn’t do him any good.”

#20195    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:May/29/2009    pub.:May/29/2009    sent:Apr/24/2013


Ranking: 3.06 / 142
A French man nearly got away with stealing a number of paintings from the Louvre.
However, after planning the robbery and getting in and out and past security, he was captured only three blocks away when his Econoline ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied, “I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.”
#11519    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Oct/29/2003    pub.:Oct/29/2003    sent:Jan/14/2013


Ranking: 2.93 / 173
Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines, and reeled in their catch.
A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle and asked the man in the middle if he new the other two.
“Oh yes” he said. “They ‘re my friends.”
“In that case,” warned the officer, “you’d better get them out of here!”
“Yes, sir” the man replied, and he began rowing furiously
#16910    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jun/6/2006    pub.:Jun/6/2006    sent:Nov/9/2010


Ranking: 3.08 / 129
A woman was in a gambling casino for the first time.
At the roulette table she says, "I have no idea what number to play."
A young, good-looking man nearby suggests she play her age.
Smiling at the man, she puts her money on number 25.
The wheel is spun, and 30 comes up.
The smile drifted from the woman's face and she fainted.
#535    
Thanks to: Dede Molter - USA.
rec.:Dec/22/1999    pub.:Dec/22/1999    sent:Mar/4/2010


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