Ranking: 2.90 / 192
Two women ran into the court of King Solomon, fighting. "My daughter was to marry this man, but this woman claims that the man was to marry HER daughter!" one of them yelled. "There is a simple solution," said the King. "I shall cut the man in two and each of your daughters can have a piece." "Fine by me!" said the first woman. "No, don't, I would rather let the other girl marry him than that!" cried the second. The King didn't hesitate for a minute. "Fine." he said. "The first woman my have him." "What?" protested the other? "She wanted him cut in two!" "Indeed." said the king. "She shows the true spirit of a mother-in-law!"
Thanks to: Leona - Coleraine - United Kingdom
rec.:Dec/3/2001 pub.:Dec/9/2001 sent:Apr/25/2003
Ranking: 3.27 / 101
A brilliant magician was performing on an ocean liner. But every time he did a trick, a talking cat in the audience would scream, "It's a trick. It's not magic. You're a big phony!"
Then one night during a storm, the ship sank while the magician was performing. And who should end up in the same lifeboat together, all alone, but the talking cat and the magician! For three days, they glared at each other, neither one saying a word to the other. Finally the cat sighed and said, "All right, smart-aleck. You and your darn tricks. What did you do with the ship?"
Thanks to: chou hogean - wawa - ontario - Canada
rec.:Oct/30/2001 pub.:Dec/9/2001 sent:Apr/29/2013
Ranking: 2.93 / 171
A family was having dinner and the little boy said,"Dad I don't like the
holes in the cheese!" Well son, eat the cheese and leave the holes on the
side of the plate.
Thanks to: Marie - Wichita - KS - USA.
rec.:Sep/10/2001 pub.:Sep/23/2001 sent:Apr/13/2010
Ranking: 3.11 / 125
The physician writing out a prescription for his hypertensive cardiac patient: “Diazepam 5mg (tranquilizer) TDS".
The patient’s wife asks, "Doctor, when are these medicines to be given?"
Doctor: "These are to be taken by you. He needs rest"
Thanks to: samir chakravarty - kolkata - west bengal - India
rec.:Oct/28/2005 pub.:Dec/22/2005 sent:Oct/9/2011