Category: Farmer Jokes



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Ranking: 3.00 / 42
A Texas Cattle Rancher and an Illinois Farmer were debating on who had the biggest spread of land. The Texas Cattle Rancher said, "I'll tell ya what son, my ranch is so big that I can get in my pickup truck and start out at the western entrance to my ranch and drive straight east all dog-gone day and still not reach the eastern entrance to my ranch". The Illinois Farmer scratched his head and spit out his chewin' tobacco and replied, "Ya know......I used to have an old pickup truck just like that".
#15508    
Thanks to: Jim Barzee - St. Louis - MO - USA.
rec.:Jul/14/2005    pub.:Jul/18/2005    sent:Dec/4/2005


Ranking: 2.66 / 64
Q. Who takes care of the farm when the farmer is sick?
A. The pharmacist
#7583    
Thanks to: Maryium Khan - Boonton - nk - USA.
rec.:Jan/27/2003    pub.:May/8/2003


Ranking: 3.06 / 36
A motorist, after being bogged down in a muddy road, paid a passing farmer fifty dollars to pull him out with his tractor. After he was back on dry ground he said to the farmer, "At those prices, I should think you would be pulling people out of the mud night and day."

"Can't," replied the farmer. "At night I haul water for the hole." 
#656    
Thanks to: KidPsyco - Texas - USA.
rec.:May/2/2000    pub.:May/2/2000    sent:May/2/2000


Ranking: 2.22 / 116
Two brothers were raised on a farm, one brother moved to town. Every year, the city brother would come out to visit the farmer brother. Every time he came out, the farmer brother was complaining about his crops. It was too hot or too cold, too wet or too dry, prices were low, the crops looked bad. As the city brother was driving out one year, he noticed the crops looking great. He had the radio on and crops were hitting an all time high. As he got out to the farm, here was the farmer brother sitting in a rocking chair with a grumpy looking on his face. The city brother asked why he was in a bad mood. The crops looked great, the right amount of rain, temp., and prices were setting records highs. The farmer brother said, you know what a crop like this takes out of the soil?
#17356    
Thanks to: Jim - MN - USA.
rec.:Oct/31/2006    pub.:Nov/13/2006    sent:May/17/2007


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