Category: Idiots Jokes



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Ranking: 2.81 / 32
An Idiot was eating in a restaurant and suddenly, he started singing aloud to the pleasure of the other customers. After eating, he stood up to go without paying for his meal. "You haven't paid for your meal" said a waitress to him to which he replied "what do you make of my entertainment then?" Getting annoyed, the waitress replied, “no one asked you to entertain anyone," to which the Idiot replied "no one asked me to come and eat here either."
#23534    
Thanks to: Joseph Adejo - Makurdi - Benue - Nigeria
rec.:Jun/27/2013    pub.:Aug/1/2013    sent:Feb/4/2014


Ranking: 2.49 / 47
Dave and Tom are fishing on a lake. After about an hour when neither of them had a bite, Dave decided to row to the middle part of the lake; where they were very successful TOM: This is a great spot for fishing Dave we'll have to mark this spot so we can come back here tomorrow.
DAVE: I know, we'll put an X on the side of the boat to mark the spot.
TOM: Don't be silly Dave that's no good we might have a different boat tomorrow.
#6961    
Thanks to: martyn lewis - United Kingdom
rec.:Dec/5/2002    pub.:Apr/16/2003


Ranking: 2.51 / 43
Three drunkards were walking down the street when they came upon a pile of manure where they stopped. The first drunkard, upon observation of the manure said to the other two, "Looks like it...” the second, bending over it and sniffing, said to the other two, "smells like it..." the third, sticking his finger in it, said, "feels like it". "Good thing we didn't step in it", they all agreed as they turned and walked away.
#15484    
Thanks to: TEENA L. WALLIN - Berkeley - California - USA.
rec.:Jul/7/2005    pub.:Jul/18/2005    sent:Sep/11/2005


Ranking: 2.16 / 74
A court appointed lawyer was defending this idiot in lower court.
The judge found him guilty, and said 30 days and $30.00.
The lawyer said “what do you want to do?”
Not having much education the idiot said, “Let’s peal it up stairs”
The lawyer said “your honor we appeal this case up to a higher court”
When they got in the higher court the judge said 60 days and $60.00.
What do you want to do now, he asked the idiot?
Let’s peal it back down stairs.
#20223    
Thanks to: El Cass - HAMPTON - vA - USA.
rec.:Jun/5/2009    pub.:Jun/25/2009    sent:Sep/18/2009


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