Category: Idiots Jokes

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Ranking: 2.44 / 41
Three drunkards were walking down the street when they came upon a pile of manure where they stopped. The first drunkard, upon observation of the manure said to the other two, "Looks like it...” the second, bending over it and sniffing, said to the other two, "smells like it..." the third, sticking his finger in it, said, "feels like it". "Good thing we didn't step in it", they all agreed as they turned and walked away.
Thanks to: TEENA L. WALLIN - Berkeley - California - USA.
rec.:Jul/7/2005    pub.:Jul/18/2005    sent:Sep/11/2005

Ranking: 2.14 / 65
A man took a bag of light bulbs back to the shop and asked for his money back, the manager asked, “why do you want your money back? The man replied, I planted every one of those light bulbs and not one of them flowered!
Thanks to: Anonymous
rec.:May/18/2004    pub.:May/18/2004    sent:Nov/26/2004

Ranking: 2.25 / 53
Jack met Claude in the street and noticed that Claude was carrying a small parcel.
‘Been shopping then, Claude?” he asked.
“Yes,” replied Claude, “I’ve just been to the perfumery to by a present for the wife’s birthday tomorrow.” “Oh, yes?” said Jack, “what did you get her, then?”
“A bottle of toilet water. Very expensive – this little bottle cost me twenty-five dollars!”
“Twenty-five dollars for a bottle of toiler water?” said Jack in amazement. “Why don’t you come home with me? You can have all you want for nothing!”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Nov/14/2002    pub.:Nov/14/2002

Ranking: 2.17 / 60
Sam had just proposed marriage to the love of his life and she had turned him down. “If you don’t marry me immediately,” he threatened, “I’ll go to the lake, cut a hole in the ice, dive in and drown myself.”
“Why this is May. The ice won’t cover the lake for eight months!”
“O.K., then I’ll wait.”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Nov/6/2009    pub.:Nov/6/2009    sent:Feb/10/2011

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