Category: Idiots Jokes

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Ranking: 2.17 / 63
Sam had just proposed marriage to the love of his life and she had turned him down. If you dont marry me immediately, he threatened, Ill go to the lake, cut a hole in the ice, dive in and drown myself.
Why this is May. The ice wont cover the lake for eight months!
O.K., then Ill wait.
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Nov/6/2009    pub.:Nov/6/2009    sent:Feb/10/2011

Ranking: 2.23 / 52
Mr. Smith and his son Rick were called to Mrs. Liventhal's classroom.
"Mr. Smith," said the teacher, "I asked Rick 'Who shot Abraham Lincoln?' and he said that he didn't do it!"
"Well, teacher," said Smith, "if my kid said he didn't do it -- he didn't do it!"
Father and son left the school, and on their way home, Smith turned to the boy and asked, "Tell me, son, did you do it?"
Thanks to: Yolanda Ortiz.
rec.:Sep/3/1998    pub.:Sep/3/1998    sent:Sep/3/1998

Ranking: 2.28 / 46
Simple Joe who is mad for the horses thought he had a sure winner the other day at the track. The tote board listed his horse as starting at 25 to 1, and he knew the race didnt start until 1:00 p.m.
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jul/31/2008    pub.:Jul/31/2008    sent:Dec/13/2009

Ranking: 2.16 / 55
Im going to buy a farm two miles long and half inch wide said Jed.
What, would you grow on a farm that size, asked Roger.
Spaghetti, said Jed.
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Mar/30/2009    pub.:Mar/30/2009    sent:Jul/1/2010

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