Category: Animal Jokes



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Ranking: 3.18 / 119
Dolphins are so intelligent that within a few weeks of captivity they can train a man to stand on the edge of their pool and throw them fish three times a day.
#19625    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Nov/5/2008    pub.:Nov/5/2008    sent:Dec/3/2014


Ranking: 2.92 / 181
A man moved to a mountain top to get rid of the hustle and be alone. One day he heard a knock at the door and no one was there but then he looked down and there sat a snail and it said "it is quite cold out here can I come in?" the man shouted "NO why don’t you all understand I want to be alone!" and he kicked the snail down the mountain. One year later there was a knock at the door and no one was there and then he looked down and there again sat a snail and it said, "What did you do that for?"
#10512    
Thanks to: aimee - United Kingdom
rec.:Jul/17/2003    pub.:Aug/19/2003    sent:Mar/12/2013


Ranking: 3.01 / 153
There were three Indian squaws. One slept on a deerskin, one slept on an elk skin and the third slept on a hippopotamus skin. All three became pregnant and the first two each had a baby boy. The one who slept on the hippopotamus skin had twin boys. This goes to prove that the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides.
#1093    
Thanks to: Andrew Edmonds
rec.:Jul/20/2001    pub.:Jul/20/2001    sent:Jun/20/2014


Ranking: 3.03 / 145
Cat Lover's Rules:
1. The cat is not allowed in the house.
2. OK, the cat is allowed in the house, but only in certain rooms.
3. Ok, the cat is allowed in all rooms, but must stay off the furniture.
4. The cat can get on the old furniture only.
5. Fine, the cat is allowed on all the furniture, but it is not allowed to sleep with the humans on the bed.
6. The cat can sleep on the bed, but not under the covers or on the pillow.
7. OK, The cat can sleep under the covers and on the pillow by invitation only.
8. Well, ok, the cat can sleep under the covers every night and on the pillow too.
9. Humans must ask permission to sleep under the cover with the cat; only the cat can sleep on the pillow.
#880    
Thanks to: Mark - USA.
rec.:Nov/28/2000    pub.:Nov/28/2000    sent:May/31/2009


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