Category: Kid Jokes



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Ranking: 3.60 / 82
A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5, Ryan, 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, 'Let my brother have the first pancake. I can wait.'" 
Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!"
#564    
Thanks to: Kathy L. Watkins - Ohio - USA.
rec.:Jan/24/2000    pub.:Jan/24/2000    sent:Feb/1/2013


Ranking: 3.62 / 79
The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employees home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered, "Hello?" Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster the boss asked, “Is your Daddy home?”
"Yes", whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him?" the man asked. To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No."
Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?"
"Yes", came the answer.
"May I talk with her?"
Again the small voice whispered, "no."
Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone, the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child. "Is there any one there besides you?" the boss asked the child.
"Yes" whispered the child, "A policeman.”
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?"
"No, he's busy", whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?” asked the boss. "Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?"
"A hello-copper", answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?" asked the boss, now alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper."
Alarmed, concerned and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked,
"Why are they there?”
Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle:
"They're looking for me."
#865    
Thanks to: Replay Stuckhart
rec.:Nov/4/2000    pub.:Nov/4/2000    sent:Nov/4/2000


Ranking: 3.19 / 142
A second grader came home from school and said to her mother, “Mom, guess what!
We learned how to make babies today”
The mother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. “That’s interesting,” she said. “How do you make babies?”
It’s simple, replied the girl. “You just change y to i and add es.”
#3963    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Apr/6/2002    pub.:Apr/6/2002    sent:May/18/2009


Ranking: 3.22 / 135
Some boy scouts from the city were on a camping trip. The mosquitoes were so fierce, the boys had to hide under their blankets to avoid being bitten. Then one of them saw some lightning bugs and said to his friend, "We might as well give up. They're coming after us with flashlights.
#66    
Thanks to: James Cusik
rec.:Jun/8/1998    pub.:Jun/8/1998    sent:Jun/8/2011


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