Ranking: 3.20 / 143
A second grader came home from school and said to her mother, “Mom, guess what!
We learned how to make babies today”
The mother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. “That’s interesting,” she said. “How do you make babies?”
It’s simple, replied the girl. “You just change y to i and add es.”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Apr/6/2002 pub.:Apr/6/2002 sent:May/18/2009
Ranking: 2.85 / 262
There was this tiger that woke up one morning and just felt great (yes, just like Tony the Tiger). Anyway, he felt so good, he went out and cornered a small monkey and roared at him, "WHO IS THE MIGHTIEST OF ALL THE JUNGLE ANIMALS?" And the poor quaking little monkey replied, "You are of course, no one is mightier than you."
A little while later the tiger confronted a deer, and bellowed out, "WHO IS THE GREATEST AND STRONGEST OF ALL THE JUNGLE ANIMALS?" The deer shook so hard it could barely speak, but managed to stammer, "Oh great tiger, you are by far the mightiest animal in the jungle."
The tiger, being on a roll, swaggered up to an elephant who was quietly munching on some weeds, and roared at the top of his voice: "WHO IS THE MIGHTIEST OF ALL THE ANIMALS IN THE JUNGLE?"
Well, the elephant grabbed the tiger with his trunk, picked him up, slammed him down; picked him up again, and shook him until the tiger was just a blur of orange and black and finally threw him violently into a nearby tree. The tiger staggered to his feet and looked at the elephant and said, "Man, just because you don't know the answer, you don't have to get so mad."
Thanks to: SimpleSentiments.com - Pembroke - Pines Florida - USA.
rec.:Apr/7/2000 pub.:Apr/7/2000 sent:Apr/16/2003
Ranking: 3.59 / 83
A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5, Ryan, 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, 'Let my brother have the first pancake. I can wait.'"
Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!"
Thanks to: Kathy L. Watkins - Ohio - USA.
rec.:Jan/24/2000 pub.:Jan/24/2000 sent:Feb/1/2013
Ranking: 3.32 / 117
One day a little girl came home from school, and said to her mother, "Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do."
The mother exclaimed, "But that's terrible! I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this ... by the way, what was it that you didn't do?"
The little girl replied, "My homework."
Thanks to: Paulina A. Candia - Santiago - R. M. - Chile
rec.:Jul/28/1998 pub.:Jul/28/1998 sent:Apr/23/2014