Category: Miscellaneous Jokes



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Ranking: 3.16 / 43
A priest, a wizard, and an engineer are sentenced to be beheaded. The priest is first and is offered a final request, to which he asks to pray. After saying a few words, he steps up to the guillotine. The blade falls, and an inch above his neck, its stops. He yells wildly "My God has saved me", and seeing this miracle, his captors release him. The wizard steps up, and he in turn asks to say a few words before his death. He says a few words in an unknown tongue, points at the guillotine, and then puts his head down to be lopped off. Again, an inch above his head the blade stops. He shouts wildly "my magic has saved me", and he is released. The engineer is than lead up to the block and says, "For my last request, I would like to face up so I can see my death coming." He is placed looking up and just before they release the blade he shouts "WAIT! I see what the problem is!"
#5063    
Thanks to: Grey Squall - Las Vegas - NV - Uzbekistan
rec.:Jun/19/2002    pub.:Sep/7/2002


Ranking: 2.83 / 66
Mary comes home rather late. “Oh, sweetheart,” she called, “your car’s on Maple Street.”
“Why didn’t you bring it home?” her husband asked. “Couldn’t, she said. “It’s too dark out there to find all the parts.”
#20665    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Dec/4/2009    pub.:Dec/4/2009    sent:May/15/2010


Ranking: 2.76 / 74
Isn't it strange how drivers who go slower than you are idiots and those that go faster are maniacs?
#17159    
Thanks to: John - United Kingdom
rec.:Aug/25/2006    pub.:Oct/16/2006    sent:Dec/14/2006


Ranking: 2.93 / 57
All eyes were on the radiant bride as her father escorted her down the aisle. They reached the altar and the waiting groom. The bride kissed her father and placed something in his hand. The guest sitting in the front pews responded with ripples of laughter. Even the priest smiled broadly. As her father gave her away in marriage, the bride gave him back his credit card.
#20406    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Aug/19/2009    pub.:Aug/19/2009    sent:Jan/8/2010


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