Ranking: 3.00 / 29
Have you heard about the next planned "Survivor" show?
* 6 men will be dropped on an island with 1 van and 4 kids each, for 6 weeks.
* Each kid plays two sports and either takes music or dance classes.
* There is no access to fast food.
* Each man must take care of his 4 kids, keep his assigned house clean, correct all homework, complete science projects, cook, do laundry, etc.
* The men only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores are done: There is only one TV between them and there is no remote.
* The men must shave their legs and wear makeup daily, which they must apply themselves either while driving or while making four lunches.
* They must attend weekly PTA meetings; clean up after their sick children at 3:00 am; make an Indian hut model with six toothpicks, a tortilla and one marker; and get a 4 year old to eat a serving of peas.
* The kids vote them off based on performance.
* The winner gets to go back to his job
Thanks to: Sandra Woods
rec.:Apr/1/2001 pub.:Apr/1/2001 sent:Apr/1/2001
Ranking: 2.81 / 32
1. An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
2. A few beers short of a six-pack.
3. Dumber than a box of hair.
4. A few peas short of a casserole.
5. Doesn't have all his corn flakes in one bowl.
6. One fruit loop shy of a full bowl.
7. One taco short of a combination plate.
8. Cranially challenged.
9. All foam no beer.
10. The cheese slid off of his cracker.
Thanks to: Falana Johnson
rec.:Jan/15/2001 pub.:Jan/15/2001 sent:Jan/15/2001
Ranking: 2.69 / 35
"And here's Moses Kiptanui, the 19 year old Kenyan, who turned 20 a few weeks ago." (David Coleman)
- "Its a great advantage to be able to hurdle with both legs" (David Coleman)
- "We now have exactly the same situation as we had at the start of the race, only exactly the opposite." (Murray Walker)
- After playing Cameroon in the 1990 world cup finals: "We didn't underestimate them. They were just a lot better than we thought." (Bobby Robson)
- On the difficulties of adjusting to playing football and living in Italy: "It was like being in a foreign country." (Ian Rush)
- "I was in a no-win situation, so I'm glad that I won rather than lost." (Frank Bruno)
- "There is Brendan Foster, by himself, with 20,000 people." (David Coleman)
- "The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical." (Murray Walker)
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jun/22/2004 pub.:Jun/22/2004 sent:Jul/14/2004
Ranking: 2.89 / 27
He does not have a beer gut; he has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.
He is not quiet; he is a CONVERSATIONAL MINIMALIST.
He is not stupid; he suffers from MINIMAL CRANIAL DEVELOPMENT.
He is not balding; he is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
He is not afraid of commitment; he is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED..
He is not a male chauvinist pig; he has SWINE EMPATHY.
Thanks to: Jennifer Gardner
rec.:Jan/13/2001 pub.:Jan/13/2001 sent:Jan/13/2001