A man is being interviewed for a job. “What are your qualifications for the job of night watchman?” “The slightest noise wakes me up.”
Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Dec/4/2009 pub.:Dec/4/2009 sent:Mar/31/2013
3.20 / 106
There was a doctor, a civil engineer, and a computer scientist sitting around late one evening, and they discussed which the oldest profession was. The doctor pointed out that according to Biblical tradition, God created Eve from Adam's rib. This obviously required surgery, so therefore that was the oldest profession in the world. The engineer countered with an earlier passage in the Bible that stated that God created order from the chaos, and that was most certainly the biggest and best civil engineering example ever, and also proved that his profession was the oldest profession. The computer scientist leaned back in her chair, and with a sly smile responded, "Yes, but whom do you think created the chaos?"
Andrew Bush - Weymouth - Dorset - United Kingdom
rec.:Nov/1/2004 pub.:Nov/1/2004 sent:Aug/11/2009
2.86 / 177
Three visitors to London climb up the tower that houses Big Ben and decide to have a contest. They're going to throw their watches off the top, run down the stairs and try to catch the watches before they hit the ground.
The first tourist throws his watch, takes three steps and hears his watch crash. The second throws his watch and takes only two steps when he hears his watch shatter.
The third tosses his watch off the tower, jogs down the stairs, goes to a candy store, buys a snack, walks back to Big Ben and catches his watch. "How did you do that?" asks one of his friends.
"My watch is 30 minutes slow."
matt friedman - NASHVILL - tn - USA.
rec.:May/19/2002 pub.:Jul/28/2002 sent:Mar/1/2013
3.39 / 77
A man with a piece of paper in his hand comes into an office where another man is sitting next to a shredding machine.
"Do you know how to operate this thing?" he asks. "I have an important paper here and I want to make sure this is done right."
"Sure," the other man answers. "Just put the paper in here and press this button."
The first man does so, saying, "Great. And where do the copies come out?"
K Meyer - Westfield - NC - USA.
rec.:Apr/19/2007 pub.:Apr/30/2007 sent:Jun/2/2007