There was a doctor, a civil engineer, and a computer scientist sitting around late one evening, and they discussed which the oldest profession was. The doctor pointed out that according to Biblical tradition, God created Eve from Adam's rib. This obviously required surgery, so therefore that was the oldest profession in the world. The engineer countered with an earlier passage in the Bible that stated that God created order from the chaos, and that was most certainly the biggest and best civil engineering example ever, and also proved that his profession was the oldest profession. The computer scientist leaned back in her chair, and with a sly smile responded, "Yes, but whom do you think created the chaos?"
Andrew Bush - Weymouth - Dorset - United Kingdom
rec.:Nov/1/2004 pub.:Nov/1/2004 sent:Aug/11/2009
3.30 / 97
A man is being interviewed for a job. “What are your qualifications for the job of night watchman?” “The slightest noise wakes me up.”
Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Dec/4/2009 pub.:Dec/4/2009 sent:Mar/31/2013
3.32 / 94
Yes, I’m tired. For several years I’ve been blaming it on getting older, lack of sleep, weekend projects, stale office air, poor nutrition, carrying extra pounds, raising a family, recent colds, and a dozen other reasons that make you wonder why life is getting rough. .
But now I found out what’s really happening! I’m tired because I’m overworked. The population of the USA reached 300 million last October. 79 million of the populations are retired. That leaves 221 million to do the work. There are 19 million toddlers and 76 million students in schools, which leave 126 million to do the work. Of that total, 21 million are unemployed leaving 105 million to do the work.
Then you take away 34 million in hospitals and that leaves 71 million to do the work. 43 million are in prisons and that’s 28 million left to do the work. Now take away 14,683,468 federal, 5,344,722 state and 5,370,743 city workers who run our government and you’re left with 2,601,067 to do the work. Take away the 2,601,065 people in the armed forces and that leaves just two people to do the work - You and Me! And you’re just sitting there reading this!
No wonder I’m tired!!!
Rob Tworek - USA.
rec.:Oct/27/2006 pub.:Nov/13/2006 sent:Nov/17/2006
3.04 / 137
A newsboy was standing on the corner with a stack of papers, yelling, "Read all about it; Fifty people swindled!” Fifty people swindled! Curios, a man walked over, bought a paper, and said, "Hey kid, this is an old paper, where’s the story about the big swindle?” The newsboy ignored him and went on calling out, "read all about it; Fifty-one people swindled!”