Ranking: 3.47 / 172
20 Ways To Confuse Trick-Or-Treaters II
11. Hand out menus to the trick-or-treaters and let them order their candy. Keep asking if anyone wants to see the wine list.
12. Get a catapult. Sit on your porch and catapult pumpkins at anyone who comes within 50 yards of your house.
13. When people come to the door, jump out a nearby window, crashing through the glass, and run as far away from your house as you can.
14. Answer the door dressed as a pilgrim. Stare at the trick-or-treaters for a moment, pretend to be confused, and start flipping through a calendar.
15. Instead of candy, give away colored eggs. If anyone protests, explain that the eggs are the only thing you had left over from Easter.
16. Answer the door dressed as a dentist. Angrily give the trick-or-treaters a two-hour lecture on tooth decay.
17. Answer the door with a mouthful of M & M's and several half-eaten candy bars in your hands. Act surprised, and close the door. Open it again in a few seconds, and insist that you don't have any candy.
18. Hand out cigarettes and bottles of asprin.
19. Put a crown on a pumpkin and put the pumpkin on a throne on your porch. Insist that all of the trick-or-treaters bow before the pumpkin.
20. Dress up like a bunny rabbit. Yell and curse from the moment you open the door, and angrily throw the candy at the trick-or-treaters. Slam the door when you're finished.
Thanks to: Mark - USA.
rec.:Oct/27/2000 pub.:Oct/27/2000 sent:Oct/27/2000
Ranking: 3.31 / 162
Teacher: Why are you late?
Student: Because, of the sign!
Teacher: What sign?
Student: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
Thanks to: Olukosi David - Ketu - Lagos State, - Nigeria
rec.:Sep/22/2003 pub.:Sep/29/2003 sent:Jan/5/2013
Ranking: 3.19 / 149
TEACHER: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
JOHNNY: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
Thanks to: Olukosi David - Ketu - Lagos State - Nigeria
rec.:Sep/30/2003 pub.:Oct/3/2003 sent:Dec/2/2010
Ranking: 3.30 / 115
Q. Where can men over 50 find younger sexy women who are interest in them?
A. Try a bookstore under fiction!
Q. How can you increase the heart rate of your 50+ year old husband?
A. Tell him you're pregnant!
Thanks to: Arthur Green - Hove - East Sussex - United Kingdom
rec.:Jul/11/2011 pub.:Jul/12/2011 sent:Sep/26/2011