Ranking: 3.32 / 77
It was snowing heavily and blowing to the point that visibility was almost zero when the little Antartian got off work. She made her way to her car and wondered how she was going to make it home. She sat in her car while it warmed up and thought about her situation.
She finally remembered her daddy's advice that if she got caught in a blizzard; she should wait for a snowplow to come by and follow it. That way she would not get stuck in a snowdrift. This made her feel much better and sure enough in a little while a snowplow went by and she started to follow it. As she follows the snow plow she was feeling very smug as they continued and she was not having any problem with the blizzard conditions.
After quite sometime had passed she was somewhat surprised when the snow plow stopped and the driver got out and came back to her car and signaled for her to roll down her window. The snowplow driver wanted to know if she was all right as she had been following him for a long time. She said that she was fine and told him of her daddy's advice to follow a snowplow when caught in a blizzard.
The driver replied that it was OK with him and she could continue if she wanted but he was done with the Wal-Mart parking lot and was going over to K-Mart next.
Thanks to: Darria Warnock
rec.:Oct/15/1999 pub.:Oct/15/1999 sent:Oct/7/2008
Ranking: 3.85 / 40
An Antartian is terribly overweight, so his doctor puts him on a diet.
"I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks," the doctor ordered. "The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least five pounds."
When the Antartian returns, he's lost nearly 20 pounds.
"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said. "Did you follow my instructions?"
The Antartian nods, "I'll tell you, though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day."
"From hunger, you mean?" the doc questioned.
"No, from skipping."
Thanks to: Yolandita Ortiz
rec.:Jul/24/1999 pub.:Jul/24/1999 sent:Jul/24/1999
Ranking: 3.12 / 95
An Antartian was running back and forth from his computer and his mailbox. Then the mailman came up to him and asked him what he was doing. He replied, "My dumb computer keeps saying 'you've got mail'."
Thanks to: Josh M. - Round Rock Texas - USA.
rec.:Jul/24/2001 pub.:Jul/24/2001 sent:Feb/4/2013
Ranking: 2.99 / 103
An Antartian woman came into a bar and asked the bartender for a drink. Then she started to yell, "Yeah!" "Yeah!" Then five more Antartians came in and started to do the same thing. Then three more Antartians came in and one of them had a Barney puzzle. The bartender asked one of them, "Why are you yelling 'yeah yeah!'?" Then one responded, "We did this puzzle in three hours and it says 2-3 years."
Thanks to: Paul - Orange City - Florida - USA.
rec.:Nov/10/1999 pub.:Nov/10/1999 sent:Dec/14/2012