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Category: Female Jokes
Ranking: 2.04 / 57
A beautiful woman in her thirties was passing through customs in London, when the customs official asks her what the reason for her trip to London was.
Business or pleasure, he asks?
Sadness and pleasure! She says to the officer!
Why?
Well, my 75 years old husband has just died and I came to his funeral!
My condolences, says the officer!
It must be a very difficult and painful time you're going through!
Not really, this is my pleasure! I'm so sad because only now I found out that he was dead broke and did not leave a dime, a penny, not even a Will for me!
#23809    
Thanks to: John Teixeira - Barueri - Sao Paulo - Brazil
rec.:Dec/10/2013    pub.:Dec/30/2013    sent:May/26/2014


Category: Animal Jokes
Ranking: 2.67 / 12
Watson came excitedly to Sherlock Holmes place and told him his dog had swallowed his ring. Sherlock told Watson "Don't worry. He will pass it eventually". Watson replies "Thank you very much, Sherlock". Sherlock says to Watson."It's alimentary, my dear Watson"
#23843    
Thanks to: Freddie Pitz - Canada
rec.:Dec/21/2013    pub.:Dec/30/2013


Category: Animal Jokes
Ranking: 3.66 / 29
A man looks out the window into his back yard and sees his dog shaking and tossing something into the air. He rushed out to find that it was the neighbors' rabbit, Mr. Bun Bun, and he was very dead. Mr. Bun Bun was also filthy with dog drool and mud, but thankfully there was no blood: his back must have broken at the first shake.
The man decided that he could not possibly explain to his neighbors how his dog had gotten into their yard and broke into the rabbit cage and killed Mr. Bun Bun while they were away.
He bathed Mr. Bun Bun until completely clean and dry, placed him back in his cage, re-latched the door and hoped they would believe that their rabbit had passed away peacefully.
Several days later, the man notices his neighbor mowing his lawn, so he walks over and asks how things were going.
"Well" the neighbor says, "not so well. We lost Mr. Bun Bun last week, and we are all still very upset about it all."
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that."
"Yes, we found him one day when we got home, and he must have died in his sleep because he looked so peaceful."
(Whew!) "Well, that does not sound too bad."
"Oh no, and we were not surprised: I mean he was very old, and had really started to show his age the last few months."
"I guess I am a bit confused then, as to why your family is still upset."
"Well, we buried the little guy out by the back fence and thought we were all done with it, but you are not going to believe this: Someone dug him up, cleaned him up and put his body back into his cage as some form of mean and nasty practical joke."
#23686    
Thanks to: Barry Foster - Indianapolis - Indiana - USA.
rec.:Sep/29/2013    pub.:Nov/29/2013


Category: Animal Jokes
Ranking: 3.33 / 15
Q: Why couldn't the pony sing?
A: Because he's a little hoarse.
#23752    
Thanks to: Robert Stephenson - New Egypt - NJ - USA.
rec.:Nov/14/2013    pub.:Nov/29/2013


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