A man bought a donkey from a preacher. The preacher told the man, "This donkey has been trained in a very unique way. The only way to make the donkey go is to say Hallelujah, and the only way to make it stop is to say Amen."
The man immediately got on the animal to try out the preacher's instructions. "Hallelujah!" he shouted. And immediately the donkey began to trot. "Amen!" he shouted again, and the donkey stopped immediately.
"This is great," he said. With Hallelujah he rode off very proud of his purchase. The man traveled for a long time through some mountains. Soon he was heading towards a cliff. He could not remember the word to make the donkey stop. "STOP!" he blurted, "HALT!" he blurted again. The donkey just kept going, "Oh no, Bible! Church! Please stop!" cried the man.
He was getting closer and closer to the edge of the cliff. Finally in desperation, the man said a prayer, "Please, dear God, please make this donkey stop before i go off this mountain, in Jesus name, AMEN!"
The donkey came to an abrupt stop, just one step from the edge of the cliff. After a brief moment to catch his breath, the man joyously said, "HALLELUJAH!"
I've never understood why women love cats. Cats are independent, they don't listen, they don't come in when you call, they like to stay out all night, and when they're home they like to be left alone and sleep.
In other words, every quality that women hate in a man, they love in a cat.