lawyer jokes

Category: "Lawyer Jokes"
3 votes

A judge and four lawyers were stuck in an elevator. Two were defense attorneys and the other two were on the prosecutor’s team.

The light in the elevator went out but it’s well known that in the light well is a spare bulb. The question is now posed, how many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb.

Answer: It only took one but it took a half hour for the judge to listen to all the arguments before he decided who had to change it.

3 votes
posted by "Marty" |
1 votes

A lawyer just purchased a new Mercedes sports car convertible and came to a stop sign. Arriving at the same time was a Hippie on a motor scooter, who leaned over and admired the beautiful car.

Annoyed, the lawyer sped away as the light changed only to see the motor scooter not only catch him, but speed past him. Now Angry, he stepped on the gas and raced to 100 mph, passing the motor scooter. Once again the scooter passed him only this time it sailed off the road into a ditch.

Ashamed, the lawyer caught up with the scooter and asked the Hippie if he was okay and did he need help. The Hippie replied, "I'm cool man, but could you unhitch my suspenders from your mirror?"

1 votes
posted by "Bumpa Hennigar" |
2 votes

Fresh out of Yale and having just passed the BAR exam, Bobby was sitting in his first interview with a prestigious law firm CEO.

CEO: "I see that you are fresh out of Yale, have just passed the BAR exam, and have an excellent academic record with A's in every course. But what we are looking for is someone with a few years of real-world experience."

Bobby thought for a moment and replied: " Well that's okay, I actually I went to college for art, I found that resume' online, and I made up the story about taking the BAR exam.

CEO: "So what you're saying is you tell creative lies that stretch the truth though research and story telling?"

Bobby: "Umm.... I guess?"

CEO: "Can you start work on Monday?"

2 votes
posted by "Slam9010" |
$8.00 won 2 votes

A politician asked a well known author, "Did you know that 'Sumac' and 'Sugar' are the only two words in English, that begin with the letters 'Su' but are pronounced like 'Shu'?"

The author replied, "Sure."

2 votes
Joke Won 7th Place won $8.00
posted by "Janice Marler" |