marriage jokes

Category: "Marriage Jokes"
3 votes

On our seventh wedding anniversary I broke out in hives...

I think they call that the seven year itch!

3 votes
posted by "Marty" |
2 votes

A man went on a dating website, hoping to find a wife. In his profile description he wrote, "Looking for a woman that is smart, pretty, funny, a good cook, organized at home, and has a BASS BOAT!"

He then paused, gave it some more thought, and added, "To be considered, please include picture of the boat."

2 votes
posted by "barber7796" |
0 votes

The husband was watching TV as his wife was out cutting the grass during the hot summer. He went out to ask his wife what was for supper. She was quite irritated about him sitting in the air
conditioned house all day, so she shot back at him, "Think of me as dead from now on and do what you would do if I was."

So he went back in the house and fixed him a big steak, potato and a big glass of tea. She walked in about the time he was finishing up and asked him, "So you fixed something to eat? Where is mine?"

He replied, "I didn't fix you anything as I thought you were dead."

0 votes
posted by "HENNE" |
0 votes

A tired and frustrated wife arrived home late from work and quietly entered the master bedroom where she saw four sets of feet hanging over the end of the bed. Furious, she grabbed an umbrella and began to hit the covers hearing groans from underneath them.

Exhausted she goes down the stairs to the kitchen for a stiff drink where she is shocked to see her husband standing in the kitchen.

"Your mom and dad arrived unexpectedly, so I gave them our room. Did you say hello?"

0 votes
posted by "Bumpa Hennigar" |