puns jokes

Category: "Puns"
2 votes

Here's a list of CLEVER WORDS for CLEVER PEOPLE...

1. ARBITRATOR
A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald's.

2. BERNADETTE
The act of torching a mortgage.

3. BURGLARIZE
What a crook sees through.

4. AVOIDABLE
What a bullfighter tries to do.

5. COUNTERFEITER
Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.

6. LEFT BANK
What the bank robbers did when their bag was full of money.

7. HEROES
What a man in a boat does.

8. PARASITES
What you see from the Eiffel Tower.

9. PARADOX
Two physicians.

10. PHARMACIST
A helper on a farm.

11. RELIEF
What trees do in the spring.

12. RUBBERNECK
What you do to relax your wife.

13. SELFISH
What the owner of a seafood store does.

14. SUDAFED
Brought litigation against a government official.

2 votes
posted by "D-Gellybean" |
1 votes

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

1 votes
posted by "D-Gellybean" |
2 votes

Just heard on the news that Uber is testing new driver-less cars...

Not sure where they are heading, but I am afraid they are gonna drive us crazy!

2 votes
posted by "Shamsou" |
0 votes

A mechanic was working under a car and some brake fluid dripped into his mouth. "Wow! That stuff isn't too bad tasting," he thought. The next day, he told his buddy about tasting the brake fluid. "It was pretty good, really. I think I'll have a little more today."

His friend was a little concerned, but didn't say anything. The next day, "Hey, I drank a whole glass of brake fluid. Great stuff! I'm going to have more." A few days later, he was up to a bottle a day.

"You know," said his buddy, "that brake fluid is poison and really bad for you. You better cut out drinking that stuff."

"Hey, no problem. I can stop any time!"

0 votes
posted by "wadejagz" |