Category: Teachers Jokes

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Ranking: 2.72 / 65
An eighth grade teacher was leading a discussion on the qualifications for being president of the United States. After the teacher commented that a person must be a natural-born citizen, one of the students raised her hand. “Does that mean that if you were born by Caesarean section that you can’t be president?”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:May/10/2006    pub.:May/10/2006    sent:Jul/10/2006

Ranking: 2.88 / 50
Teacher: If you had 20p in one trouser pocket and 60p in the other, what do you have?
Pupil: Someone else’s trousers, miss.
Thanks to: Samantha Wells - United Kingdom
rec.:May/13/2003    pub.:May/28/2003

Ranking: 2.30 / 125
Teacher: Today is the first day of the school, any questions?
John: Yes, when will the Holidays start?
Thanks to: ulfeeee - bombay - India
rec.:Sep/14/2003    pub.:Sep/18/2003    sent:Dec/4/2003

Ranking: 2.67 / 64
I pride myself on being patient when teaching driver education, something I have done for 30 years. I have encountered many, many students, who didn't seem to be able to hit the floor with their hat. But one incident was just too much.

I had a sweet young thing behind the wheel for the first lesson of the semester. She had volunteered to go first and seemed ready to show the other two kids how well she could drive. We left the rural school and started toward town.

As we approached the first stop sign, the young lady gave no sign that she saw it. We got closer, but she still did not slow down. Finally, I used the "teacher's brake" pedal, on my side of the car, to get us stopped.

When I asked her why she didn't slow down to stop for the stop sign, she replied, "but, Mr. Smith, the speed limit is 35 ALL the way to the stop sign!"
Thanks to: Steve Smith - USA.
rec.:Jan/7/2005    pub.:Jan/13/2005    sent:Mar/4/2006

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