Meet Shane, the Greatest Walmart Employee...

1. Shane, Quit offering extended Warranties on the fried chicken----Management
2. Shane, stop asking "Is that your final answer?" and offering to let them phone a friend after each order----Management
3. Shane, Quit putting price tags on the Deli equipment and trying to sell them to customers---Management
4. Shane, stop implying Walmart keeps the "Good Stuff" in the back----Management
5. Shane, I don't know what "Swinecraft" is but ham cannot be sold as a building material---Management
6. Shane, THE DELI IS NOT an appropriate setting to practice your ventriloquism, please stop making puppets out of the paper bags-----Management
7. Shane, STOP putting "Stoner Approved" seals on the fried chicken----Management
8. Shane, STOP putting out samples labeled as "Mystery Meats"----Management
9. Shane, STOP putting "Some assembly required" stickers on the 8-piece chickens----Management
10. Shane, any FREE samples you offer must come from the deli department, not from electronics------ Management