A man rolls on the couch, clutching his knee in agony. His wife asks him, "What's the matter dear?”

The man replies, "I have got a splitting headache in my knee."

A straight eyed and cross eyed guy bump into each other, and the cross eyed guy said to the straight eyed guy.

“Why don’t you look where you are going?"

The straight eyed guy responded to the cross eyed guy.

“Why don’t you go where you are looking?"