After having a great time with his girlfriend, a young man saw a guy’s photo in her bag and asked,
"Is he your ex?"

The girlfriend kissed him and said, "No dear, that's me before surgery."

This is the shortest murder story ever written:

Wife: Are you listening to me?

Husband: No.

No one knew she had a dental implant, until it came out in conversation.

Little Johnny runs to his dad and says, "Dad, there's water in the carburetor of the car!"

"How can you be so sure?" the father asks.

"I just know there is," replies Little Johnny.

"Do you even know what a carburetor is?"

"No," says Little Johnny.

"OK, where is the car?"

"In the lake."