I said to my wife, "I need to call the doctor today."

"Which doctor?" she asked.

"No, the regular kind."

A man was walking down the street stealing loads of garden gates...

No one said anything in case he took a fence!

Moe: "My wife converted me to religion."

Joe: "Really?"

Moe: "Yes. Until I married her I didn't believe in hell."

The heart specialist was operating on the patient when he suddenly said, “Don’t worry, Adam. This is a minor operation. Everything will be all right.”

The patient replied, “Thank you Doctor, but my name is Jose.”

The heart specialist said, “I know that. Adam is my name.”