Favorite this joke Three kids argue, whose father is the fastest.
One says, "My father is the fastest, he can overtake an arrow he shot with a bow."
The second one says, "My father is even faster - he can shoot a gun and then run to catch the bullet before it hits anything."
The third kid says, "You actually don't understand what speed is. My father is even quicker! He finishes work at 4:30 pm, but he's back home by 3:45 pm almost every day."
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? Spare ribs.
Why should a skeleton drink 10 glasses of milk a day? It's good for the bones.
Why don't skeletons like parties? They have no body to dance with.
A friend hosted a dinner party for people from work and everyone was encouraged to bring their children. All during the sit-down dinner one co-worker's three-year-old girl stared at the man sitting across from her. The girl could hardly eat her food from staring.
The man checked his tie, felt his face for food, patted his hair in place, but nothing stopped her from staring at him. He tried his best to just ignore her but finally it was too much for him. He asked her, "Excuse me little girl, but why do you keep staring at me?"
Everyone at the table had noticed her behavior, and the table went quiet for her response. The little girl said, "I just want to see how you drink like a fish."
"How come you're late?" asked the bartender, as the blonde waitress walked into the bar.
"It was awful," she explained. "I was walking down Elm street and there was a terrible accident. A man was thrown from his car and he was lying in the middle of the street. His leg was broken, his skull was fractured, and there was blood everywhere. Thank God I took that first-aid course.
"What did you do?" asked the bartender.
"I sat down and put my head between my knees to keep from fainting."
Free Daily Joke