Favorite this joke The doorbell rings. A man opens the door and there's his mother-in-law on the front step.
She asks, "Can I stay here for a few days?"
The man says, "Sure you can." And he closes the door.
A middle aged man was visibly shaken when his Doctor advised that he had only six month's to live because of a terminal disease that was detected during a recent physical check-up.
The Doctor suggested that he should get his "house in order", make sure his will was current and ensure all final arrangements were in place for the funeral. He should then make plans to enjoy what might be left of his life, to the fullest.
"What will you do for the last six months?" asked the Doctor.
His patient thought for a few minutes then replied, "I think I'll go and live with my Mother-in-law".
Surprised by the answer, the Doctor asked, "Of all people, why in the would you want to live with your Mother-in-law?"
"Because it'll be the longest six months of my life!"
A few animals are in a restaurant. The waiter comes over at the end of the night with the check.
The skunk says, "Don't look at me, I haven't got a scent."
The duck says, "Just put it on my bill!"
The cow says, "You'll have to ask one of the udders."
The elephant blurts out, "It's on me, I have enough money in the trunk!"
Two old friends were chatting. One said to the other, "My 85th birthday was yesterday. The wife gave me an SUV."
Other guy responded, "Wow, that's amazing! Imagine that, an SUV... what a great gift!"
"Yup! Socks, Underwear, AND Viagra!"
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