Favorite this joke When I asked my boss for a salary rise because I was doing the work of three men.
He said he couldn't increase my pay, but if I told him the names of the three men he'd fire them.
An American manufacturer is showing his machine factory to a potential customer from a foreign country. At noon, when the lunch whistle blows, two thousand men and women immediately stop work and leave the building.
"Your workers, they're escaping!" cries the visitor. "You've got to stop them."
"Don't worry, they'll be back," says the American. And indeed, at exactly one o'clock the whistle blows again, and all the workers return from their break.
When the tour is over, the manufacturer turns to his guest and says, "Well, now, which of these machines would you like to order?"
"Forget the machines," says the visitor. "How much do you want for that whistle?
I was on vacation in Texas, and was appalled by Dallas' chaotic traffic.
I asked the bellhop at the hotel why it was so disorderly.
"In some countries, they drive on the right, in others on the left. Here, we drive in the shade."
Here are the reasons I'd like to thank Wal-Mart, K-Mart, Target, and my local grocer for having 25 checkout lanes and only three open at any given time.
- I can run next door and pick up my dry cleaning.
- I can catch up on my magazine reading without buying any.
- I can catch a quick catnap now rather than on the drive home.
- I can finally apply my top coat of nail polish with plenty of drying time.
- I can practice my standup comedy routines on unsuspecting fellow customers.
- I can assess what other people have in their carts and get exciting new dinner ideas.
- I have time to leave my cart in line and run back to get the 13 things on my list I forgot.
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