Q: What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?

A: You're too young to smoke.

Mother: Did you behave well in church today, Marjie?

Marjie: I certainly did. A nice man offered me a plate full of money, and I said, "No thank you."

Q: What part of a car is the laziest?

A: The Wheels, they are always tire'd.

A farmer was running back home when it started to rain. Then suddently he slipped and fell into a muddy puddle.

Suddenly lightning flashed across the sky. The farmer annoyed shouted to the sky saying "First you get me wet. Then you put mud all over my clothes. Now, as if that wasn't enough YOU'RE TAKING A PHOTO OF ME !!!!".