On a first date, the young man thought he'd impress the young lady, a piano and voice teacher, by taking her to a karaoke bar.

After going up and singing a song, and now feeling confident as ever, he thought he'd ask a music question to impress her even more. He asked her, "What key did I sing that in?"

She replied, "Most of them."

Ever been told something, but you can't decide if it's a compliment or an insult?

Recently, when I greeted my coworker, she said, “You look so gorgeous, I didn’t recognize you!”

The beginner's guide to decoding work emails...

I have a question = I have 18 questions

I’ll look into it = I’ve already forgotten about it

I tried my best = I did the bare minimum

Happy to discuss further = Don’t ask me about this again

No worries = You really messed up this time

Take care = This is the last you’ll ever hear from me

Cheers = I have no respect for you or myself

One day at home the phone rings and Joe answers it. On the other end is a confused woman who asks, "Who is this?"

"This is Joe. With whom did you wish to speak with?"

After a pause the woman says, "Did you just say whom?"

"Yes, I did."

"Then you're definitely not my son!"