A farmers wife is cooking. She says "I need a cup of molasses, but I ran out."

Farmers runs outside and returns with two dead moles.

Wife says, "I said a cup of molasses, not a couple of mole asses!"

Why doesn't the ocean leak?

Because it has Seals.

If you paint your finger purple, and wiggle it in the air, is it ... FingerPrince?