Favorite this joke A man leaves on Friday to go to Chicago.
He stays three days and returns on Friday.
How was that possible?
Friday was the name of his horse.
One day long ago, a Czechoslovakian came to visit his friend in New York. When asked what he wanted to see the Czechoslovakian replied, "I would like to see one of the zoos in America."
To his delight, the New Yorker took him to the zoo. While they were touring the zoo, and standing in front of the gorilla cage, one of the gorillas busted out of the cage and swallowed the Czech whole.
Shocked, his friend from New York quickly called over the zoo keeper. He quickly explained the situation and ask the zoo keeper what he planned to do. The zoo keeper asked the man, "Okay, which gorilla did it? Was it the male or the female?"
Pointing out the female as the culprit, the zoo keeper then opened up the mouth of the female, looked inside, but found no signs of the Czech.
With which the man from New York shrugged and said, "Guess the Czech is in the male."
Two nuns who worked in a hospital were out driving in the country when they ran out of gas. As they were standing beside their car on the shoulder of the road, a truck approached them.
Noticing the nuns in distress, the trucker stopped and offered to help. When the nuns explained they had run out of gas, the trucker said he would be more than happy to drain some from his tank, but he didn't have a bucket or a can.
Hearing this, one of the nuns dug out a clean bedpan from the trunk and asked the trucker if it would do. He said it would and proceeded to drain a couple of quarts into the pan. He then handed the pan to the sisters, got back into his truck and waved goodbye.
While the nuns were carefully pouring the precious fuel into their gas tank, a cop happened by. He stopped and watched them for a few moments, then said, "Sisters, somehow I don't think that's going to work, but I sure do admire your faith!"
Mom: Son, why don’t you talk to Mark anymore? You used to be best friends.
Son: Well would you talk to someone who is stupid, uses drugs, and is an alcoholic?
Mom: Of course not.
Son: Well, neither would he.
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