To show my wife how much I love her I bought her a beautiful diamond ring...

I had it engraved with the cost.

I have finally found something I must be in love with...

GRAVITY!

I fall for it all the time.

What is the least spoken language in the world?

Sign language.

My wife has weekly lessons with Satan on how to be more evil...

I can vouch that what ever she charges him is well worth it!