"How's the new turkey you hired on as temp IT Assistant?"

"Well, she's good at de-bugging, and works for chickenfeed. But her typing is atrocious--all she can do is hunt & peck."

An extremely vain sorceress zoomed into the local dollar store on her broom, fuming from head-to-toe. “Which one of you morons is responsible for putting my name on your product without my permission? I’m going to turn you into a toad!”

A shuddering young clerk bravely came forward— “I’m extremely sorry ma'am; I honestly thought Witch Hazel was an approved product.”

“You idiot,” screamed the hag. “I’m talking about the Barbie doll!”

Did you hear about the angler who baited his hook with peanut butter?

All he would catch was jellyfish!