Favorite this joke "You should meet my husband. He makes a living with his pen."
"Oh, so he's a writer?"
"No, he raises pigs."
Teacher: "Children, there will be only a half-day of school this morning."
Johnny (in back seat): "Whoopee! Hurray!"
Teacher: "Silence. We'll have the other half this afternoon."
"Did you see that charming girl smile at me?"
"Yeah, but the first time I saw you, I too had to smile."
Muggins: "Yes, I'm living out in the country now. It certainly has it inconveniences."
Buggins: "What do you miss most?"
Muggins: "The last train home at night."
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