What did one disgruntled cardboard fake fan say to another?

"I wasn't cut out for this!"

Two guys were walking past an outdoor basketball court.

"You want to play Horse?" asked one guy.

His friend replied, "Sure, I guess... but only if I get to be the front legs."

I wished my wife a Happy Birthday this morning and then joked, "The clown and the pony will be here a bit later!"

She responded, "Don't worry, I've been sheltering-in-place with the clown for almost a year now."

For once, instead of the ridiculous statement, "Please note our menu options have changed..."

How about, "Our menu options are the same as they have been for years. Just prepare to be on hold for a very long time..."