I just got a job making plastic Draculas.

There are only two of us on the production line, so I have to make every second Count.

Why couldn't the sesame seed leave the gambling casino?

Because he was on a roll.

I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.

A mother and son where out for lunch at a diner.

The waitress says, "Cops and kids under 5 eat for free!"

Mother discreetly nudges her 6 year old.

The son says, "I'm a police."