Boy: The principal is so dumb!
Girl: Do you know who I am?
Boy: No...
Girl: I am the principal's daughter!
Boy: Do you know who I am?
Girl: No...
Boy: Good! *walks away*

A child asked his father, "How were people born?"

So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on."

The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now."

The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!"

His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."

A young man excitedly tells his mother he’s fallen in love and that he is going to get married.

He says, “Just for fun, Ma, I’m going to bring over 3 girls and you try and guess which one I’m going to marry.”

The mother agrees.

The next day, he brings three women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while. He then says, “Okay Ma, guess which one I’m going to marry.”

She immediately replies, “The one on the right.”

“That’s amazing, Ma. You’re right. How did you know?”

The mother replies, “I don’t like her."

We were all in the hospital for the last time with our family and at some point my Aunt asked who of us want coffee. We were all die hard coffee drinkers and we all agreed so my aunt said "ok, i'll bring full tray".

My Grandpa lifted his head for the last time and said "rather bring the coffee in a cup, it's so hard to drink from the tray"

He was Amazing...