Biology Teacher: Did you know that you have 60,000 miles of blood vessels in your body?

Little Johnny: No wonder I have tired blood.

Pulling guard duty in the army is dull work.

But I never realized just how dull until one night, with nothing else to do, I looked underneath my desk.

There I found these words scrawled by a predecessor: Man, you must really be bored!

During the first day of Navy Boot Camp, the lieutenant in charge had a stack of cards with each person’s name on it. He said, “When I read off your name, I want you to step forward, say 'Here, sir', then salute me, and then get back to where you were!”

Lieutenant: “Andrews!”

Andrews: “Here, sir!”

Lieutenant: “Cooper!”

Cooper: “Here, sir!”

Lieutenant: “Seeback!” (No response) “Seeback! (Still no response) “I said Seeback!”

The admiral next to him whispers something in his ear. The lieutenant then turns the card over and says: “Lodge!”

Lodge: “Here, sir!”

I’m close friends with 25 letters of the alphabet...

I don’t know 'y'.