A boastful Englishman was holding forth on the merits of his watch to friends in New York City. At last, one of the American friends decided he could stand it no longer.

"That's nothing, "he interrupted. "I dropped my watch into the Hudson a year ago, and it's been running ever since."

The Englishman looked taken aback. "What!" he exclaimed. "The same watch?"

"No," he replied, "the Hudson."

Which runs faster, HOT or COLD?

HOT because anyone can catch a COLD.

I wanted to donate blood today but they ask too many personal questions...

Like, "Whose blood is it?" and "Where did you get it?"....

Two DIZZY type ladies were discussing the big hole in a street as every day somebody fall in it...

Dizzy A : We must find a solution cause every day some one is dead and the nearest hospital 20 Km.

Dizzy B : I got it, we build a new hospital beside the hole.

Dizzy A : It will take 5 - 10 years to build a hospital. After that everybody will be dead. I got a great solution... we close that hole and open another one beside the nearest hospital!