I'm terrified of elevators...

I'm taking steps to avoid them.

The well known concert pianist agreed to listen to a friend's daughter play the piano. He was a very polite man and didn't make a wry face, even though he wanted to.

"Do you think I should go to the conservatory in Paris?" she asked after she had finished.

"It can't hurt," he replied hastily. "There are many eligible bachelors there."

Principal: "Johnny, no running in school. Now, just why are you in such a hurry?"

Little Johnny (out of breath): "Sir, I'm trying to keep two fellows from fighting!"

Principal: "Who are those fellows?"

Little Johnny: "Billy Jones and myself!"

He was a bit shy, and after she had thrown her arms around him and kissed him for bringing her a bouquet of flowers, he arose and started to leave.

"I'm sorry I offended you," she said.

"Oh, no, I'm not offended," he replied. "I'm going for more flowers."