What is it called when you get sick while riding in a carpool?

CAR POOL TUNNEL SYNDROME.

What did one fly say to the other?

Time to call the SWAT TEAM!

A not-so-smart lady called the airline booking agent to ask how long a flight was from Los Angeles to New York?

The busy agent replied, "Just a moment."

The not-so-smart lady replied, "Thank you," and then hung up.

The judge reviews the divorce case very carefully and issues his judgement. "Mr Smith, I am going to give your wife $750 a month."

Mr. Smith's replies, "That's very nice of you, judge. And every once in a while I will send her a little extra too."