You 'put your two cents in'...

But it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'...

What's the deal, where's that extra penny going to?

My wife said she'd like to have another baby...

I agreed. The one we have is starting to annoy me.

Part of a flight attendant's arrival announcement: "We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you'll think of us."

If Lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked,...

Doesn’t it then follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?