Two men were at a race track discussing fast horses when one said he had a horse that was faster than an automobile.

"Faster than any automobile? Who was he sired by? You know his fathers name?"

"Why, he is so fast he ran away before he could find out his fathers name!"

Chauffeur: "All this talk about back-seat drivers is a bunch of nothing. I've driven a car for over ten years and have never heard a word from behind.

Cabby: "What type car do you drive?"

Chauffeur: "A Hearse."

This past spring my church was flooded along with other places in the area. On the day back one of the Sunday School teacher decided to have a lesson on Noah and The Ark.

She asked the question: "Did you know that all the animals came on the ark in pairs?"

After some discussion, the teacher's fears were realizes as Little Johnny was waving his hand to be called on.

Little Johnny volunteered, "Teacher, all but the worms! They came on board in the apples."

My neighbor called and invited me over to see his new aardvark.

When I arrived he ask if I would like to play with him?

The aardvark was growling loudly and does not seem very friendly so I ask, "Does it bite?"

My neighbor replied, "That's what I want to find out..."