What helps keep your teeth together?

What else, Toothpaste!

My wife was getting annoyed that I kept leaving freezer door open and it kept on defrosting.

We have since split up, it’s all water under the fridge.

"Doctor, I think I'm a moth."

"It's not a doctor you need, it's a psychiatrist."

"I was on my way there when I saw your light on."

I was having trouble with my computer at work so I called IT Support...

He said, "Have you tried disabling cookies?"

I said, "Well, I once bit the legs off a gingerbread man?"