Little Johnny's father took him on a fishing trip to Canada.
On returning home after catching only three fish his father says, "The way I figure it each fish cost us $400!"
Little Johnny replied, "Well, at that price it’s a good thing we didn’t catch any more of them than we did."
While touring an old Roman prison the first tourist says: "Listen to this. It says here that in some old Roman prisons they have unearthed the petrified remains of some of the prisoners."
Second tourist: "Gracious, that must be where the name 'hardened criminals' originated."
Little Johnny, on recess, was carrying a car door while playing outside with his buddies on a very hot day.
His teacher called him over to ask, "Why?"
Little Johnny replied, "If I get too hot, I can roll down the car window!"
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family...
... in another city!