I do really feel bad for the Class of 2020. People say your senior year flies...

I just didn’t realize it would Zoom!

Why did Novak Djokovic pay for his flight to Australia with a Mastercard?

Because his Visa didn’t work.

The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and was giving an oral test.

Speaking specifically about manic depression, she asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?"

A young man in the rear raised his hand and answered, "A basketball coach?"

My landlord texted me saying we need to meet up and talk about how high my heating bill is.

I replied back: “Sure, my door is always open.”