I haven't sold any copies of my autobiography...

That's the story of my life.

If I was a rapper my handle would be "Gershwin" and I'd demand that the cover art for my cd's would be exclusively rendered in blue designs.

That way I could truthfully say that they are Gershwin's rap cd's in blue.

A camel with two humps is a Bactrian camel.

A camel with one hump is a dromedary camel.

What do you call a camel with no humps?

Humphrey, of course!

Last night, my wife and I watched two movies back to back.

Fortunately for me, I was the one who was facing the television.